Dating
in Preparation for Divorce
in the COGs of the Twenty-first Century
By Tim Moore
Forward:
This study addresses the problems and misconceptions concerning dating and
betrothal in the Churches of God. It
addresses the unfortunate plight of the People of God concerning a topic that
has been buried in the Twilight Zone for political reasons with other discarded
doctrines of the Churches of God. In
this most important topic, the one concerning how to choose a mate, especially
when a person is young, concerns a
way, a unique way of life, taught only in the pages of the Bible.
This way
of course contradicts the very focus on self and self worth constantly taught in
this world. The choices you make in
dating and betrothal
precede and determine the success of your marriage. Are you choices based upon the Word of God or Human
Reasoning. There is an important
principle that What Goes Around, Comes Around. What kind of home are you building for yourself?
You may have to live in it. Make
sure you know what the
error of Baalim was.
1
Kings 18:17 (KJV) And it came to pass, when Ahab saw
Elijah, that Ahab said unto him, Art thou he that troubleth Israel?
18 And he (Elijah) answered, I have
not troubled Israel; but thou, and thy father's house,
in that ye have forsaken the commandments of the LORD, and thou hast
followed Baalim.
19 Now therefore send, and gather to
me all Israel unto mount Carmel, and the prophets of Baal four hundred and
fifty, and the prophets of the groves
four hundred, which eat at
Jezebel's table.
20 So Ahab sent unto all the children
of Israel, and gathered the prophets together unto mount Carmel.
21
And
Elijah came unto all the people, and said, How long halt ye between two
opinions? if the LORD be God, follow him: but if Baal, then follow him.
And the people answered him not a word.
22
Then said Elijah unto the people, I, even I only, remain a prophet of the LORD;
but Baal's prophets are four hundred and fifty men.
***************************************
Dating
in Preparation for Divorce
In the COGs of the Twenty-first Century
Lo,
this only have I found, that God has made man upright; but they have sought out
many inventions. (Ecclesiastes 7.29)
***************************************
CHAPTER
1:
The
Just Shall Live By Faith
We’re
going to begin this part of the study in Proverbs 16:25.
This is a proverb, which an old Pastor very often used, and it is one
that is given twice in the book of Proverbs.
The other time is in Proverbs 14:12.
Proverbs
16:25
There is a way that
seems right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.
The
proverb is a warning that any evil activity that seems successful and safe could
take any number of turns to destruction. It
is interesting that the Hebrew in this instruction is in the plural, and it
could easily be translated "the roads
of death." Or if we want to
make a more literal translation of the verse, we could say, "The roads of
death are many, but they all end at one place: death."
Direction,
or a course of life, is not always what it seems to be. The imagery that is used in this scripture is that of a
traveler who feels that he is on a strange road at the time, and it seems safe,
but it is fatal because the destination is wrong.
An issue in the proverb is one of how deceptive evil is.
It might promise, and even deliver large quantities of happiness, of
power, and a seemingly good life, but it cannot sustain what it gives beyond the
grave. The deceptiveness of evil
when one makes a choice in life can have far reaching consequences.
This principle is shown in many places in the Bible where both men and
women made choices that reached out and affected not only their families, but
also nations for thousands of years.
Several
months ago I once asked a question, "Do not little things matter?"
This explores the world’s proposition that one can afford to overlook
little things, thinking they no longer matter under the New Covenant, that all
that really matters is the spirit of the activity, and if you’re in a good
spirit, and if you’re in a good activity, then everything is okay.
This
study follows the same general theme, but it is more directly focused on what we
would consider doctrines, especially doctrines important to the Church of God.
This subject came to mind because of a report involving the Sabbath.
I think that you would consider the Sabbath doctrine to be important to
the Church of God, but to the rest of the world of religion it is a matter of
small concern.
It
seems that the pastor of an Illinois Seventh Day Adventist Church offered one
million dollars to anyone who could show him anywhere in the Bible that one is
commanded to keep any day other than the Sabbath. He may have received some
challenges from some sincere but uninformed people. The serious theologians know that such a command does not
exist in the Bible. The Seventh Day
pastor is on safe ground; however, shortly thereafter a second report appeared
which featured comments made in response to the first report.
The
overall tenor of the comment followed a familiar pattern.
That is, if you can’t really defeat the challenge, ridicule it or the
author. Attempt to make the
challenge seem foolish. This approach is nothing but a dodge, but one person likened it to trying to determine how many
angels can dance on the head of a pin. The
underlying thought in this ploy is that it doesn’t matter when
you worship
God, because one can worship
God at any time.
Another
person used the "time has been lost" to me. In other words, there is no accurate calendar available to
mankind, so it’s a spin of the dice, and any day is as good as another.
Even Jerry Falwell chipped in to what I think was a fairly surprising
one. I don’t know that he sent it
in himself, or that somebody quoted him, but at any rate he was given credit
because he said that he personally believed that Jesus was crucified on a
Wednesday, and He arose at six o’clock p.m. three days and three nights later.
However, he said, "When Jesus arose from the dead, it was already
Sunday by Jewish and biblical reckoning."
Turn
now to the New Testament to Romans 14:1-5.
This is a set of scriptures that is fairly frequently used in this
particular argument.
Romans
14:1-5
Him that is weak in the faith receive you, but not to doubtful disputations
[that is, hair-splitting arguments]. 2 For one believes that he may eat all
things: another, who is weak, eats herbs [or vegetables]. 3 Let not him that
eats despise him that eats not: and let not him which eats not judge him that
eats: for God has received him. 4 Who are you that judges another man’s
servant? To his own master he stands or falls. Yes, he shall be held up: for God
is able to make him stand. 5 One man esteems one day above another: another
esteems every day alike. Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind. 6 He
that regards the day, regards it unto the Lord, and he that regards not the day,
to the Lord he does not regard it. He that eats, eats to the Lord, for he gives
God thanks; and he that eats not, to the Lord he eats not, and gives God thanks.
It
is true that by adhering rigidly to the common misunderstanding of what people
think the word worship means, that one can worship God on any day that one chooses, but the common misunderstanding
is not what this context is concerned with. The weaknesses that Paul is talking
about here is in reference to matters of "the faith”.
The Fourth Commandment is not at issue here. At issue here are matters of personal preference such as some
matters pertaining to diet, eating or fasting, or not eating, or eating things
sold in market places fearing they may have been offered to an idol.
If
the keeping of the Sabbath were simply a matter of personal preference, and
therefore morally indifferent, we would have to apply the same principle of
judgment to the rest of the Ten Commandments, because then the rest would also
be matters of merely personal preference. One
could say, "I prefer to murder, and that person does not prefer to
murder," or "I prefer to commit adultery, and that person does not
prefer to commit adultery, or lie” or “I prefer to dishonor my parents and
disobey them, and that person prefers to honor his parents and obey them."
We are not talking here that the commandments are matters of personal
preference. The Sabbath is not a
matter of personal preference. For
that matter, none
of the Ten Commandments are matters of personal preference.
The
common misunderstanding of the word "worship" is limited to a formal worship service.
Biblically, the word "worship"
can mean to reverence God in a formal manner or setting in a church service, but
it also includes things like bowing and praying in reverence, because God
confronts one at any time different from a normal service. I want to show you an
example of this in Genesis 24:26 and 52. This is just so clear.
Now this is worship happening at any time.
Genesis
24:26
And she said unto him, I am the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, which she
bare unto Nahor. 25 She [Rebekah] said moreover unto him [the servant of
Abraham], We have both straw and provender enough, and room to lodge in. 26 And
the man bowed down his head, and worshipped
the LORD.
It
doesn’t say that this was the Sabbath day.
This is something that can happen at any time, and the Bible is showing
that you can worship
God at any time. It doesn’t
necessarily have to be a formal service. Yes,
here is an example of worship,
part of a unique way
of life that is connected to the betrothal
of Isaac. I have chosen this
example because of the unique topic of this study.
V52
And it came to pass that when Abraham’s servant heard their words, he worshipped the LORD, bowing himself to the earth.
This
is not worship
as is intended in the Sabbath commandment.
In its widest application worship
can also mean what one does all
the time in reference to God, whether work, play, education, within marriage,
dating, betrothal, childbearing, or in business.
In other words, all the activities of one’s life are devoted to God out of respect
in regard to Him. In its broadest
sense, this can be considered in the biblical sense as worship. But this is a far
cry from the Fourth Commandment where we are commanded to keep the Sabbath in a
holy convocation. That is not at
issue in Romans 14. Since biblical worship
is not limited to the common misunderstanding, that statement that one can worship God at any time is nothing more than another misleading dodge.
It doesn’t address the issue regarding the Sabbath question.
Another
area of contention regards dating
practices and who has authority in permitting marriage and dating
and how it should be done in the Churches of God.
Likewise, sincere but deceived and uniformed people will field a variety
of good sounding ideas promoting individualism.
But will their ideas hold up under biblical scrutiny as the standard?
Do those who claim that selection of a mate is strictly an individual
choice have biblical grounds to base this claim upon?
Or is there a higher power and authority that has set the standard of how
to pick and obtain a mate within the Churches of God?
Is there a higher authority on how this most important phase of one’s
life should be undertaken? I
personally believe that young people, in their early twenties or younger, are at
no time more poorly equipped to make this most important decision.
Is there a biblical model and perspective, which minimizes potentially
disastrous consequences if it is understood and followed?
If there is such a model, does this model follow the guidelines of
properly worshipping
God and showing the reverence and respect to him in all that we do? These are some of the questions this study will address as we
progress. The same technique of dodging
is used by the secular society to discredit a biblical model for dating,
betrothal, and marriage as for denigrating the Sabbath.
We’re
going to turn to the book of Isaiah 1:2 as we begin to broaden out the overall
subject of this study to include why
people get these strange ideas in the land of Israel.
And the way things are today in the land of Israel; these things need to
be understood.
Isaiah
1:2
Hear, O heavens, and give ear, O earth: for the LORD has spoken, I have
nourished and brought up children [the Israelites, and specifically here the
Judahites], and they have rebelled against me. 3 The ox knows his owner, and the
ass his master’s crib: but Israel does not know, my people do not consider.
Israel
does not know the God of the Bible.
On television recently the entire nation was privileged to witness the
vivid display of the typical Israelitish approach to religion.
We witnessed three Protestant clerics, including a woman, a Catholic
priest, a Jewish rabbi, and an Islamic cleric participating in the same worship service at the National Cathedral. They did this in a spirit of unity because of the national
emergency, even though they all believe differently about many things relating
to God and religion. Normally they
have very strong disagreements over doctrine.
Now
did the same God teach all of them different things about Himself, and what
pleases Him? I think that the
overwhelming majority of people watching that display are led to that
impression, that it doesn’t matter what one believes about the
way to
God, and thus God Himself doesn’t care either.
Not only does that suddenly teach that God doesn’t care, but also it
implies strongly that He has no plan, that
any old way
will do as long as one is a nice person, because all God wants is for people to
accept Jesus Christ and to be saved, and that there is no specific goal to which
God is bringing them.
The
answer to my question about God being the same God who taught them things about
himself and what pleases him is "yes." It was the same god, but it was not the God of the Bible.
It was not the God of the Bible who did this confusing and hypocritical
practice, and it ought to be clear to us that Israel does not know the true God.
That’s just as it says in Isaiah 1:2,
"Israel does not know."
To
add to this, I recently heard of a person who is obviously drifting away from
the Church of God. He is still
interested in religion, and so he has gotten into the habit of routinely
watching Protestant preaching services on television. In questions on this, his justification about doing this
practice was that, "They are all so nice."
He meant that they conduct themselves well, and that he felt safe
listening to their messages because their conduct leads him to conclude that
they believe the same things that we do. It
apparently never entered his mind that being nice can be nothing more
than a public relations skill.
I
could say that I met a very nice young
man yesterday, and another very nice
young woman at the hotel that I might be staying in.
But let me ask you a question. "Did
Satan appear before Adam and Eve in the Garden as some monstrous apparition
scaring them half to death? That is
not the picture that I get. He came
with every appealing public relations ploy, confronting them with a seemingly
logical rationale that any choice they made was just as good as the one that God
appointed. Part of his rationale
was that it was important for them to learn to make adult decisions and proper
choices. Satan probably emphasized
that their ideas and thoughts were important and that individuality and freedom
of expression was important. They
of course fell for it. They bought The
Lie in all aspects of life, including picking and securing a mate.
Proverbs
31:30 says that charm—being nice—is deceitful.
It’s charming, and it can hide a multitude of not-so-obvious flaws.
It can be nothing more than a ploy to hide or to achieve, what God would
surely call vanity, useless goals, pursuits, or practices.
The
assembly of ministers that we witnessed at the National Cathedral overwhelmingly
believes that this is God’s world, and therefore they do not really separate
themselves from it, and they participate fully in its wars and politics.
They believe that heaven is the reward of the saved, and that keeping the
law is not necessary for salvation, and thus repentance is rarely a sermon
subject, nor is growing in the grace and knowledge of Jesus Christ, or going on
to perfection. Consequently,
they also promote a practice of young people picking and choosing their own
mates as the ideal approach.
They
believe that one can be buried in baptism by dropping a few drops of water on
one’s head. Most of them do not
believe in the laying on of hands.
They believe in a god who tortures people in an ever-burning hell that
one goes to immediately after death, because they are all tangled up regarding
the resurrection. They don’t
believe that God is going to give everyone a fair chance for salvation by fully
revealing Himself to each and every person in His own good time.
They
don’t believe that mankind’s ultimate destiny is to be begotten, and then
born into the family of God, even as God is God, even though by putting together
a number of clear scriptures it can easily be seen and understood.
For that matter, a lot of the Churches of God have also abandoned this
quaint idea from the past. They
have modernized the truth once revealed to them.
Consequently they discount the importance of the family and dating
toward marriage as a God Plane Relationship.
I
know that you know that I could go on naming specific doctrines this world’s
Christianity deviates from, but I have a question. If it doesn’t matter much at all what a person believes,
why are some portions of the Bible filled with specific instructions regarding who,
what, why, where, and how things are to be done?
It
can be showed from scripture that God directly led Israel the whole
way to
a specific end: the Promised Land. Now
suppose a Protestant, Catholic, Jewish, or Muslim cleric was leading the
Israelites in the wilderness. Would
they end at the same place as God, with each one of them going a different way?
That is utterly impossible.
Turn
now to Acts 9:1-2.
Acts
9:1-2
And Saul, yet breathing out threatenings and slaughter against the disciples of
the Lord, went unto the high priest, 2 and desired of him letters to Damascus to
the synagogues, that if he found any of this way, whether they were men or women, he might bring them bound unto
Jerusalem.
My
Bible has a center reference, and it says in regard to the word "this"
is verse 2, "the." ". . . if he found any of the
way."
Acts
18:24-26
And a certain Jew named Apollos, born at Alexandria, an eloquent man, and mighty
in the scriptures, came to Ephesus. 25 This man was instructed in the way of the
LORD; and being fervent in the spirit, he spake and taught diligently the things
of the LORD, knowing only the baptism of John. 26 And he began to speak boldly
in the synagogue: whom when Aquila and Priscilla had heard, they
took him unto them, and expounded unto him the way
of God more perfectly.
That
is very clear. But note that he
knew only the baptism of John but he still knew the way. Proper
upbringing regarding respect, dating,
marriage, and other personal relationships can be achieved and known without the
Holy Spirit, at least to some degree.
Acts
19:23
And the same time there arose no small stir about that way
Again,
in the margin it changes the word "that" to "the."
Turn now to Acts 24. In this chapter Paul is before Felix, pleading his case.
Acts
24:14
But this I confess unto you, that after the
way
which
they call heresy, so worship I the God of my fathers, believing all things which
are written in the law and in the prophets.
V22
And when Felix heard these things, having more perfect [or complete or accurate]
knowledge of that
way,
he deferred them, and said, When Lysias the chief captain shall come down, I
will know the uttermost of your matter.
Again
my Bible changes the word "that" to the word "the"
in the margin.
Acts
16:17
The same [a demon-possessed woman] followed Paul and us, and cried, saying,
“These men are the servants of the most high God, which show unto us the way of salvation.” In
every case the definite article is used, not indicating something general, but
rather in sharp contrast something very specific, as shown by the repeated use
of "the."
The
word "way"
in the Reader’s Digest Oxford Complete
Word Finder has twenty distinct applications in the English language;
however, three of them caught my eye in particular.
They are: 1) A course or route for reaching a place, especially the best
one; 2) A method or plan for reaching an object; and 3) A specified direction.
From
the same dictionary you will find one of "way’s" usage is to describe the
unique.
This is very interesting. Now
because of the definite article "the,"
that is exactly how it is used in these verses that I gave you in the
book of Acts.
In
the book of Isaiah, doesn’t somebody speak out from behind a person and say,
"This
is the way. Walk you in it.”
This is a specific direction that is unique.
Christianity,
as inspired by God, is a unique way
of life, which by following, one can obtain salvation.
That is what all of those verses in Acts says: a unique way to be saved.
The
word "unique"
from the same dictionary is described as meaning: "all of which there is
only one."
If something is unique,
there is only one.
It means unequaled; having no like, equal or parallel.
It means something that stands by itself.
By God’s own testimony, in His word, there is only one way to get
there, and that is the
way He
is leading each of us—the emphasis on the word He,
because He says in His word, "I
have led you the whole way."
Jesus
said, "My kingdom is not of this world. If it were, then My servants would
fight." Christianity and this
world are not compatible with the United States and its
way, or any other way, in any other part, in any other
nation of the world, and yet the Church has to live within the hostilities of
the ways of these nations, and it is something that we have to deal with.
This world and its religions, its politics and warfare are not part of God’s
way. Adam
Clarke’s comment on Acts 9:2 states:
"That
way implies
the whole of the worship
due to Him, and prescribed by Himself—the
way or
path in which He wills men to walk, that they may get safely through
life."
Better
than insight, the statement, especially as it contains the word whole—"the
whole of the worship
due Him"—this world’s Christianity is in the very seriously damaging
habit of eliminating any of God’s requirements if they decide that they are
too uncomfortable to deal with. Why
is it this way since the word of God is so easily available?
I think that I know what has happened in our cultures, and there is an
eerily familiar parallel between ancient Israel and modern-day Israel, giving
evidence once again that human nature never changes.
Go
now to Acts 20:27. Paul is
addressing the Ephesian elders for the very last time.
He is on his way back to Jerusalem.
He knows that he will probably never see them again, and he never did,
but he claims to them:
Acts
20:27
For I have not shunned to declare unto you all the counsel of God.
The
word "counsel"
here can be translated "advice,"
"will,"
or "purpose."
"I have not failed to give you the whole will or purpose of
God." Paul was a vehicle
through which God’s doctrines were given to the called-out ones.
Let’s apply this first of all to the Israelites in the wilderness.
We see a First Century example that Paul didn’t fail in the job that
was given to him, and I am sure that none of the other apostles failed either.
Hebrews
4:1
Let us therefore fear, lest a promise being left us of entering into his rest,
any of you should seem to come short of it. 2 For unto us was the gospel
preached, as well as unto them; but the word preached did not profit them, not
being mixed with faith in them that heard it.
Likewise,
just as the Apostle Paul says in Hebrew 4:1-2, I am absolutely certain that the
prophet Moses, and Aaron did not fail to give the counsel of God to the
Israelites in the wilderness. But
what did they do? They rejected it.
They didn’t believe it, and with a multitude of rationalizations they
refused to believe it, and they died in the wilderness.
In other words, they were not saved.
They didn’t reach the land of safety, the land of inheritance, because
their personal conduct shows that they refused to follow the way. By their conduct
they kept deviating at important forks in the road.
Likewise,
when it comes to dating
and betrothal,
even the Churches of God reject what is in the Bible.
Just as Esau sold his inheritance for a bowl of soup, young people in the
Churches of God have not been taught that there is a spiritual aspect of God’s
laws concerning dating
and betrothal
before marriage. They have not been
showed, and if they have been showed they reject the knowledge of how to have a
truly happy marriage, by starting wrong. They
will not give up self-will as taught by the world in this matter. They sell their future happiness and that of future
generations for a bowl of cold soup. Instead,
they are tricked into focusing on how they need to make an adult choice and the
need for them to control their destiny (Note the focus on self).
Paul
made another statement in regard to the Israelites of his day in Romans 10:13.
I want to apply this to us today, because the principle that is here
applies to us.
Romans
10:13
For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. 14 How then
shall they call on him in whom they have not believed? [That’s the world in
general out there.] And how shall they believe in him of whom they have not
heard? And how shall they hear without a preacher? 15 And how shall they preach,
except they be sent? As it is written, How beautiful are the feet of them that
preach the gospel of peace, and bring glad tidings of good things! 16 But they
have not all obeyed the gospel. . .. [There’s the problem. It’s not that
they didn’t hear. It’s not that they didn’t have the opportunity to hear.
They simply didn’t obey it.] . . . For Isaias says, Lord, who has believed our
report? 17 So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.
Through
the written word, if we start applying this in a modern setting, has there ever
been a time in the history of mankind when the Bible has not been so readily
available as it is now? The United
States alone turns out millions of Bibles every year, and they are distributed
all over the world in I don’t know how many different languages.
For the purpose of this study I’m only concerned about Israel at this
time going through the written word, because the Bible is so easily available,
and verbally through mass communication. God
has made the gospel available to modern Israel in this wilderness of religious
confusion, but modern man has refused to believe the whole
of it. Romans 1:16-17 makes it very
clear.
Romans
1:16-17
For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto
salvation to every one that believes: to the Jew first, and also to the Greek.
17 For therein [in the gospel] is the righteousness of God revealed from faith
to faith: as it is written, The just
shall live by faith.
In
the days of Moses it was preached and not believed. The way of salvation was given to them, and they died in the
wilderness. In the apostles’ day
in the First Century, Paul is saying in principle the same things, but very few
were hearing and believing, and we are seeing that witness in modern Israel.
The Bible has never been more available than it is now, and the Church of
God, at least through Herbert Armstrong, God made a witness available to
millions—tens of millions, and maybe hundreds of millions of people—over
almost a sixty-year period of time.
But
what has happened in practical application?
The world of Christianity has focused on Jesus Christ to the virtual
exclusion of everything else, picking and choosing doctrines.
Sometimes it seems almost at random and thus neglecting commanded
responsibilities like keeping the laws of God that Jesus clearly stated that He
did not come to destroy. This includes such obvious things as keeping the Sabbath and
the Holy Days, which the Bible shows that Jesus Himself kept.
Nowhere
can this be evidenced more than in the commonly held customs of dating
and marriage, even within the Churches of God.
The success rate of dating
and marriage within the Churches of God is no better than anywhere else. I would submit this is because for the most part,
God’s Way, the
way, has never been tried.
For the most part the ideas and customs of the world in regard to dating
and marriage is all that has been tried. So
you should not expect to find better results within the Churches of God.
I
am sure that you are aware that except for the Psalms, most of Christianity has
virtually rejected two-thirds of "the every word
of God" that we are commanded to live by, and so they are confronted
with the impossible task of attempting to produce a specific product without
using many of its ingredients. Some
of the ingredients in dating, betrothal,
and marriage regard who has authority and how that authority is to be
administered. If all of the
ingredients are not put in a cake it will not be fit to eat.
If all the biblical principles governing dating,
betrothal, and marriage are not found, realized,
or used in forming this most important relationship, the result of course is a
relationship which leaves a bad taste in the participants’ mouths.
Let
me illustrate the impossible task of attempting to produce a specific product
without using many of its ingredients. I
will focus on some principles that appear first of all in the book of Leviticus.
I’m only interested in the principle that is here.
The instructions examined broadly apply to the meal offering.
Leviticus
2:11 No meal offering, which you shall bring unto the LORD, shall be made with
leaven: for you shall burn no leaven, nor any honey, in any offering of the LORD
made by fire. 12 As for the oblation of the firstfruits,
you shall offer them unto the LORD: but they shall not be burnt on the altar for
a sweet savour. 13 And every oblation of your meal offering shall you season
with salt; neither shall you suffer the salt of the covenant of your God to be
lacking from the meal offering: with all your offerings you shall offer salt. 14
And if you offer a meal offering of your firstfruits
unto the LORD, you shall offer for the meal offering of your firstfruits
green ears of corn dried by the fire, even corn beaten out of full ears. 15 And
you shall put oil upon it, and lay frankincense thereon: it is a meal offering.
16 And the priest shall burn the memorial of it, part of the beaten corn
thereof, and part of the oil thereof, with all the frankincense thereof: it is
an offering made by fire unto the LORD.
Do
you see how specific the instructions are?
Those specific instructions are given by God and are part of the
"ALL", “THE WAY” of the word of
God that we are to live by. Let’s
go to another place in Exodus 30:9.
Exodus
30:9 You shall offer no strange incense thereon, . . .
"Strange"
here simply means anything that The
Eternal has not commanded.
V9
. . . nor burnt sacrifice, nor meal offering; neither shall you pour drink
offering thereon.
He’s
talking about the incense altar.
V32
Upon man’s flesh shall it [oil] not be poured, neither shall you make any
other like it, after the composition of it: it is holy, and it shall be holy
unto you. 33 Whosoever compounds any like it, or whosoever puts any of it upon a
stranger, shall even be cut off from his people.
At
its worse that can mean being put to death, at its best maybe disfellowshipping.
V34
And the LORD said unto Moses, Take unto you sweet spices, stacte, and onycha,
and galbanum; these sweet spices with pure frankincense: of each shall there be
a like weight: 35 And you shall make it a perfume, a confection after the art of
the apothecary, tempered together, pure and holy: 36 And you shall beat some of
it very small, and put of it before the testimony in the tabernacle of the
congregation, where I will meet with you: it shall be unto you most holy. 37 And
as for the perfume which you shall make, you shall not make to yourselves
according to the composition thereof: it shall be unto you holy for the LORD. 38
Whosoever shall make like unto that, to smell thereto, shall even be cut off
from his people.
Instructions
like this are given in order that we understand that The Eternal’s doctrinal teachings are to be followed exactly, and
nothing is to be consciously excluded. A
classic example of doctrinal teachings not being followed exactly, but rather
being twisted to suit someone’s ideas would be the Pentecost issue.
Let me go through a number of the Pentecost instructions here.
I am not going to enumerate the technicalities.
I just want to number the basic instructions.
1)
There had to be a harvest.
2)
The offering had to be made from seed that the Israelites planted in their own
fields which they had worked and reaped. No
other grain is acceptable, because that is what God’s instruction says.
3)
Pentecost must be counted to.
4)
The Wave Sheaf offering and the harvest all occur on the same day.
This is very important. Harvest
is work. You do not do that on a Sabbath.
5)
If the count begins on a fixed date even though that fixed date follows a Holy
Day Sabbath, this eliminates the need to count, because Pentecost will also fall
on a fixed date which God could have easily given.
But He did not. Pentecost
has to be counted.
6)
The count must begin using a Weekly Sabbath
as an anchor to reference the start.
7)
The only Sabbath that is not a fixed date is the Weekly Sabbath and therefore
the count must begin using that day as an anchor or reference point.
If
we do not follow these rules, we will end up on the wrong day. The same principle of disbelieving and throwing out certain
rules of God affects the far and larger and more important issue of salvation
itself. Each doctrinal deviation or
omission can be compared to an important fork along the way to salvation, and
each deviation or omission from the way altars
a person’s perspective, his world view, the way
he looks at things, the way he thinks, and
thus conducts himself. In a like
manner the way one approaches the government
issues, issues of authority within a family, and dating
toward marriage will have an effect upon the outcome of his marriage.
Herbert
Armstrong often compared the way of salvation to a picture puzzle, and that is a
good illustration because it takes all the pieces in the right order to give one
a clear picture. You have to
examine and understand all of the scriptures in the entire Bible and put them
all together to draw a blueprint of how to date
toward a successful marriage.
Let’s
go back to Matthew 7 to a very interesting section, I think, when viewed this
way.
Matthew
7:13 Enter you in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate and broad is the way
that leads to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: 14 Because
strait is the gate, and narrow is the way which leads unto life, and few there
be that find it.
These
two verses are at the beginning of a series of contrasts that begins Jesus’
conclusion to the entire teaching that is contained within the Sermon on the
Mount. Each one of these contrasts
shows that choices must be made along the way.
In other words, we are going to be confronted with making a choice
between continuing following one way, or
making deviations. God is warning
us it is going to happen.
V15
Beware of false prophets which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly
they are ravening wolves. 16 You shall know them by their fruits.
Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?
17 Even so every good tree brings forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree
brings forth evil fruit. 18 A good
tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good
fruit. 19 Every tree that brings
not forth good fruit is hewn down and cast into the fire.
[Notice He doesn’t say when, it could begin within a marriage doomed by
wrong dating procedures.] 20 Wherefore by their
fruits you shall know them.
So
two trees appearing to be similar until the fruit is examined. There are possible deviations there, and Jesus is telling us
where to look so that we can make the right choice. We are right back to the Two
Trees in the Garden of Eden.
We
have two contrasting professions of loyalty.
We all know that God wants us to be loyal.
What Jesus is demanding is loyalty.
So here we have contrasting professions of loyalty.
The people out there in the world say that they’re being loyal to
Christ, but you see, only one does the will of God while the other perpetuates
iniquity, even though they might look nice.
Yes dating and betrothal
and the approach you take to them are parts of loyalty to Christ.
They represent how you approach “the
way” of life he wants you to lead.
V24
Therefore whosoever hears these sayings of mine, and does them, I will liken him
unto a wise man which built his house upon a rock [or the rock, as it says in
the margin]: 25 And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew,
and beat upon that house: and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock. 26
And every one that hears these sayings of mine, and does them not, shall be
likened unto a foolish man which built his house upon the sand: 27 And the rain
descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house:
and it fell: and great was the fall of it.
Here
we have two contrasting foundations for faith that appear on the surface to be
similar, until trials come, and only the one remains truly solid.
In
verses 13 and 14 there are two gates, and there are two
ways. The one gate and the one way is more attractive than the other, but it is the less
attractive one—the more difficult gate and way—which
is the correct one. Human nature
wants gratification so badly that it is usually willing to take the easy
way rather than the hard way.
Mario Hernandez put it well in a sermon where he discussed spiritual
maturity. He defined this maturity
as the ability to set aside short term gratification in order to acquire long
term gain.
One
of the things that you can see here that Christ is teaching is that there are
many possible ways of deviation. In
the first contrast He is both the gate and the way.
In the second, only the Tree of Life will produce the right fruit.
In the third, only striving for sinlessness will prove loyalty.
The fourth is especially interesting because it begins with the word
"therefore." It is
actually the conclusion to the entire Sermon on the Mount which contains a vast
amount of teaching. Jesus’
conclusion is that it is only those who both hear and do His sayings who will be
saved. Jesus’ counsel is that
merely hearing His sayings will not change one’s life.
Many examples abound in the Old Testament concerning people who saw,
could see, something they needed to change, but they did nothing.
Dating and betrothal
is an area where you had better believe that if you see something which needs
changing, you had better change it.
I
want you to just briefly think about the religious world in Modern Israel.
These people hear the word of God, but it is very obvious that they are
not doing the word of God. The man whose house collapsed was at fault, not because he
failed to labor, but because he labored at the wrong things. The shifting sands represent human opinion and the doctrines
of men as contrasted to the sayings of Christ.
Notice Paul’s comment regarding exactly the same thing in Romans
10:1-3.
Romans
10:1-3
Brethren, my heart’s desire and prayer to God for Israel is that they might be
saved. 2 For I bear them record that they have a zeal of God, but not according
to knowledge.
Isn’t
that what Isaiah said? "My
people don’t know Me." V3 For they being ignorant
of God’s righteousness, . . .
This
is what is happening out in the world. They
are not taking from the Tree of Life.
They are taking from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil that is very
attractively packaged for them by the god of this world.
These sincerely deceived people are thinking that they are worshipping
the God of heaven, and they are not. The
lesson for us is to understand that we could very easily fall for this snare.
The deviations are possible, and Jesus allows us to deviate, but He
certainly doesn’t want us to deviate. The
dating practices of this World do not conform to
the word of God. Just because
everyone is dating a certain way does not mean
it is right.
V3
For they being ignorant of God’s righteousness, and going about to establish
their own righteousness, have not submitted themselves unto the right
[righteousness] doing of God.
That
is what the word righteousness means—the right doing of God. Both ancient and modern Israel almost completely
misunderstands the purpose of God’s law.
God’s law is a guide about how life is to be lived, and it is a guide
to lead us in the way that Christ lived, and it can be kept only in the same
manner in which Christ kept it.
Jesus
kept God’s laws because He had the nature to keep it, and He kept it because
of His close and abiding relationship with the Father.
He Himself testified, "The Father that dwells in Me, He does the
works." Likewise, Jesus opens
the gate and the way to the Father, and the
conclusion of His purpose of creating Himself in us in order that we might labor
at keeping the doctrines of God that will aid in creating the finishing of that
purpose. Dating
toward marriage is a most important part of the process used in finishing the
purpose of God.
Let’s
now examine Romans 8:6-9.
Romans
8:6 For to be carnally minded is death: but to be spiritually minded is life and
peace, 7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to
the law of God, neither indeed can be. 8 So then they that are in the flesh
cannot please God. 9 But you are not in the flesh, but in the spirit, if so be
that the spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the spirit of
Christ, he is none of his.
Doctrines
related to the Law of God are most likely to be rejected by human nature.
Human nature will supply rationalizations in order to reinforce why we
cannot do what God commands, and we are thus then led to reject those doctrines,
and very likely our failure to submit will have its basis in a lack of humility.
We will then follow the path of least resistance to human nature.
The Western cultures motivate people to come up with rationalizations
that all roads lead to the same place, anywhere.
Deuteronomy
8:2-3 And you shall remember all the way which the LORD your God led you these
forty years in the wilderness, [Why?] to humble you, and to prove [to test] you,
to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep his commandments, or no.
Deviations
from the way are a test. God wants to see what we’re going to do, and so He is going
to allow tests. Likewise,
inconveniences are tests. It is
inconvenient for most young people to summit to God’s laws and approach dating
and betrothal as it is taught in the Bible.
The are proud. They have
been taught to partake of the Tree of the
Knowledge of Good and Evil. Even
in the Churches of God they have bought “The
Lie.” Young people have been taught to believe that marriage is a
personal choice, theirs and theirs alone.
V3
And he humbled you, and allowed you to hunger, and fed you with manna, which
you knew not, neither did your fathers know; that he might make you know
that man does not live by bread only, but by every word that proceeds out of
the mouth of the LORD does man live.
V16
Who fed you in the wilderness with manna, which your fathers knew not, that he
might humble you, and that he might prove you, to do you good at the latter end.
We
must be aware that the same God is working in us all along the
way who worked with and guided the Israelites in the wilderness , and
that He will follow this well-established pattern.
We’re fully capable of creating our own troubles and trials, and along the
way we do that very frequently, but there are going to be times that He
purposely creates trials for us. That
is what He says here. "I made
you to go hungry." We must
understand that sin per se is not always the cause, but rather we are caught in
the midst of His perfecting processes, His efforts, His labors to bring His
children to maturity, to completion, to the end that He purposes.
The
word "hunger" can represent to us a wide variety of specific
situations in which we feel distinctly weakened, unable to confront the
situation and to overcome it simply because we do not have the resources.
We don’t have the strength. This
is what happens when we go hungry. Do
we not become physically weak in carrying out our responsibilities?
These weakness-revealing circumstances are brought upon us specifically
to humble us.
I’m
going to go back and read something to you in Matthew 5:3—the very first of
the Beatitudes. It’s the most important one, because all the others have their
root in this one.
Matthew
5:3 Blessed are
the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
What
happens if we recognize spiritual bankruptcy, and we are too weak to fight the
spiritual problems? Where do you
turn to get strength? God brings
these problems on us to bring us humanly to our wits end, to force us, as it
were, to reach out to God for help. To
human nature it is humiliating to be called upon to do something that it
doesn’t want to do, but is right according to the
way of God. In a similar
manner, if you do not make the right choices in the procedures you use to choose
a mate, spiritual bankruptcy will be brought upon you by your own actions.
You will still have to reach out to God’s word for the solution.
Naturally, God’s word will lead to the commandment to honor
and obey your parents. This is
fundamental in understanding how to choose a mate according to God’s will.
Let
us make sure that we do not reject the straight and narrow by allowing human
nature to provide an accepted deliverance from confronting our weaknesses by
rejecting a doctrine or a teaching of God concerning dating
and betrothal.
Yes, there is a way that seems right,
but the end thereof are the ways of
death. Follow Jesus’ advice
beginning in Matthew 7:13 to the end of the chapter, and make the right choice.
Make the right evaluation each and every time.
Develop the faith to be able to choose a Joyful Marriage.
Choose to live by faith. Choose
to live like Abraham and his family.
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CHAPTER
2: Hope